Got a good reason for taking the easy way out – to Djouce, a hilly wooded area a bit more than half an hour’s drive from our house in Co. Wicklow. (If you have a few minutes, watch the original video of the “Day Tripper” from 1965, which was – for whatever reason – uploaded just a couple of weeks ago. The moves during the intro are absolutely hilarious.)

The day felt a bit like the Camino: a long, quiet walk with tons of fresh air, with few people around, fantastic smells from the trees and the grass around us, good conversations and never-ending time.

In fact, it was so nice that we decided that we’ll be going on Day Trips every Saturday, weather permitting, into ‘nature’. There must be gazillions of trails and walks in and around Dublin just waiting to be discovered. And there is nothing like a bit of a distance, from where the world looks blue and green, where there is harmony, and where there’re voices of hope and peace. – God is watching us. From a distance.

The shop where the bike was bought said ‘bring it in tomorrow’. The owner of the shop down the road said ‘Ah sure, its almost half five and I’m closing up. Bring it in tomorrow’. I had explained that the race is tomorrow and that it was just a change of break pads – which I had in my pocket but could not change myself. And then: a really nice young man in the third shop said ‘sure, bring it in’ and then changed the pads in 2 minutes. He wouldn’t take any money. Nor would he when I came in a second time when I needed help adjusting one of the breaks themselves. (Note: *not* my bike, not my race:)

Isn’t it amazing that shop #1 and shop #2 are still around? I mean, would you ever really go back to them? I mean, I am the customer, I’m going to pay, I need their help, I’ve even bought products worth hundreds of euros from them. And then they don’t have 2 miserable minutes? I had to think of insurance companies who charge their loyal customers (who don’t shop around at renewal date) twice the premium they charge new customer (who do shop around). They take your money and run…

The philosophy seems to be (like with the Irish water charges): if you’re stupid enough to pay (or stick with a bad service) you don’t deserve any better.

When the approach should be that relationships are valued, people are supported (not exploited) and charges are levied fairly. But, of course, that approach is fast disappearing. Sadly.

Pádraig had the therapy session of his life today. He even continued practicing by himself with some exercises when the therapist was just chatting to him and us about how he could be working out on his own.

We have decided to look for more therapists and also for carers ourselves. People Pádraig needs and people he would be happy to work with, to spend time with – and vice versa. I started with a search for occupational therapists (OTs) sending out many emails to professionals listed on their association’s website. Receiving very few positive replies. Though some were promising.

I’ll do a similar search for carers. And speech therapists. Maybe there is someone out there looking for a job, Maybe someone from abroad would like to come to Dublin for a while? – Who knows…

It’ll have to be someone with an “old-fashioned type” of attitude and outlook, with a sense of service and responsibility, someone who’d understand Pádraig’s interests and shared them, with a good sense of humour and a caring heart.

Another visitor. Another really great physio session. Pádraig is having good days these days. If we could get the necessary routine and reliability into other areas of his day I could almost see how we could work on his rehab, get through the day, make progress – and not being stressed out. I’m sure that one day we’ll get there.

India, Spain, Jordan, Waterford – all sorts or strange and wonderful places are destinations for some of Pádraig’s friends who are everything but settled down. It’s the travel, the change, the “I won’t tie myself down” attitude to life that reminds me of my reluctance to take up a mortgage. Taking out a loan, spend the money and then returning it for most of your life was not what I grew up with. In my ‘world’, I was taught to save and then spend. There was no dependency on a bank’s interest rate, or on anyone who might decide to call in the debt. There was no dependency on anyone.

I still like that feeling. It makes you responsible. It requires you to be active and take charge. It is a proud kind of thing. It’s a “I don’t have to wait for others to make things happen, I can do it myself” kind of thing.

Of course, we always need others to help us. And they will. If they see us stop making excuses, taking responsibility, if they see us stop making excuses, and if they see us doing the right thing with all of our heart and deep convictions.

Who would not want to take responsibility and do the right thing?

There was laughter and never ending smiles from Pádraig with a level of slagging going on between his friends that he was enjoying tremendously. There was no end to it. They didn’t want to leave and he didn’t want to go to sleep. He and his friends had a fantastic time. There wasn’t a taste of this boring every-day routine stuff we are going through with far too little fun and far too much ‘have-to-do’…

To be honest, I don’t want to go to sleep either. (And I have that feeling most days.)

I tried swimming today. Where would you go but to the National Aquatic Centre, the NAC. Everybody else must have known because there were just about half a dozen of swimmers in there. They were cleaning the pool and were charging twice the normal, already overpriced entry fee – because they were deep-cleaning the main pool with only the diving basin open. The 25m lane was fine. I had it all for myself. (I had paid twice for it:) I managed to do 1k. It’s a start.

Staying fit will not allow me to control life. But I hope it’ll help me to deal better with what life holds in store for me. – How pathetic does that sound.

When you think it couldn’t it does get worse. Over the past days, family members shared stories that are almost unbearable to listen to. From what I would call physical assault (something that happened a good 20 years ago) to incredible delays in getting access to the most basic medical diagnostics, such as an EEG.

What The Irish Sun wrote today about Pádraig is an optimistic and positive view of the healing process that is possible. The tragedy is that it is a process that is happening despite, and not because of, the structures that are in place in Ireland to support injured like him.

In the story they ask their readers to help us find premises. – Maybe, just maybe someone will read this and say: I have an idea!

Today I promise myself that I will find a leat two carers, and two to three therapists that will help us support Pádraig’s recovery. I won’t care much about the cost. I will keep the receipts and send them to the HSE.

Who knows what will happen…

Today I started a retirement course. Yes. I can’t believe it myself. As it happens, as a spouse I got a free ticket. I’ll continue tomorrow. I learned as much about the attitude of old people towards gender as I did about retirement. It was unbelievable to see and to hear how clearly defined it was in some of the participants’ mind what the role of the male and the female partner in a relationship is.

Pádraig today got the satellite of love dish installed providing the free-to-air Irish channels as well as the U.K. and European Continental channels, including Spain and Germany. It took far too long to make this happen. But it did. Happen.

As will many other things. We just need a long breadth.

Pádraig met people today he hadn’t seen in many, many years – some were there from his primary school days, including teachers and students. There were neighbours, old and new, long time friends, and people who had just heard about it from the Parish bulletin or who had seen one of the many flyers that had been posted all around the area.

There were cakes of all shapes and sizes, tea and coffee, offered by really helpful and kind helpers who made sure nobody remained hungry or thirsty. Then there was the raffle with super prizes all organised by Marie and her friends. Neither Pádraig nor any of us had ever been at what has become an annual event by now, organised by Marie for ‘Caring for Pádraig’. We had just heard fabulous stories about the day – and today, we experienced that it was all true.

Without today, without the fundraising by Marie, her family, friends and neighbours and the friends of Pádraig himself, we wouldn’t be able to organise and pay for Pádraig’s therapies, he wouldn’t be able to receive the specialised intensive therapy sessions in Pforzheim, Germany. And without that therapy, Pádraig would not have made the progress he has made.

So, here’s to you!

How long it’ll last, nobody knows. That’s true for most things in life, even life itself. It’s especially true for those resolutions I adapt from time to time. (I’m sure I’m not alone here, am I?) But I am determined to do more to live a healthy life. Because I want to live a long, long life. Kinda have to, it seems…

Anyhow, not only have I started to ‘run’ again (5k this morning ending up in a big sweat) but I’ve started to eat ‘green’ stuff and fruit as never before – for the last three days:) Along with fish oil and chia seeds (apparently the “super food of the Aztecs” – though they’re not around any longer…)

Though I’ll make an exception tomorrow. Can’t wait for that coffee morning with all the nice cakes and tea and coffee and, above all, brilliant company!

We walked into town today and bought more ‘super food’, including bulgur, couscous, and quinoa. It all felt really healthy:) Now we just have to eat it. (Also bought a bit of steak, just in case.)

On the way back we got the bus. Pádraig had been on the bus here in Dublin a few times. For me, it was the first time with him. I had heard so much about how difficult it was to use public transport in a wheelchair. Glad to say that our experience today was really, really good. People, including the bus driver (!), could not have been more helpful.

Is what I’m writing here a true reflection of my life? What I feel? What I do? How I am and how we are getting on?

Certainly not.

There are organisations who do not want to be named. There are institutions who do not want to be criticised. There are individuals who do not want to be mentioned. And there are feelings I do not want to or I cannot share.

So what am I writing about?

A kind of sanitised version of what is happening? An account of how well Pádraig is doing? A very optimistic view of how An Saol is developing?

We were talking today about of how most of the news in Ireland is bad news: scandals, murders, accidents. And how, when we were in Cuba many many years ago, all the news were positive: achievements, success stories, stories of courage and accomplishment. I think, at times, what I am writing is closer to Cuba than it is to Dublin.

Will I change or just continue to write up a sanitised version of what is going on? What would you do? What makes the most sense? Does either version make sense writing about? Reading about?

Maybe versions of life are just that: versions? Always…