Last night, having turned Pádraig, I could not go back to sleep. I stayed up and wrote an email. You know, I know, everybody knows that this is not what you do unless you want to get yourself into deep trouble.
I did it anyway. And I sent it.
It was an email to someone who cares about An Saol and brain injured people. The person had read the proposal for the An Saol pilot project and proposed that we should get the support of one of the established organisations. The person also raised some concerns about a certain message being sent implicitly to potential readers by the fact that those working in the proposed day care centre would be trained abroad.
What I wrote in the email was that here we are, knowing that the human rights of people with catastrophic injuries are being violated and that social justice is not being done. Now someone comes along and wants to change that situation, is looking for support and advice and is not getting it at home, but, surprisingly, abroad. On this background, telling me who I should work with, i.e. those who are not engaging to the extend required to affect change, did cost me a night’s sleep.
When I went back to bed, I had an hour left before I had to get back up. I went into a half-sleep, one of those that encourage dreams. My early morning dream was of Pádraig standing in front of me, supported by me, and when I let go he managed to stand all by himself. There was a rush of happiness going through my whole body.
When Pádraig was standing in his tilt table later on this morning with his arms around my neck and my body supporting his from the front, he started to give me a big big strong hug, the first really strong hug since his accident.
He must have had the same dream early this morning and together, this morning, we knew that one day, I will be able to let go of him and he will stand there all by himself again.