Today we took a walk, on the wild side, as it turned out. In the red zone. We were exploring our neighborhood, and trying to get out of all of these restricted spaces we have (not) been moving in lately: ICUs, Picanto, apartment.

Dulsberg – the tiny red zone in the middle of the map, surrounded but affluent yellow.

Hamburg is one of the richest and biggest cities in Germany. So rich that the local newspaper reported in July of last year: ‘Hamburg to expensive for average income earners‘. A study found that rent in Hamburg is only affordable to just about 11% of the average income earners. Many people had to move out of the city (sounds familiar?). The average distance between the city and where people live is 27km in Hamburg, just 8km on average in Germany – which is about the distance between O’Connell Bridge and Santry in Dublin.

When I was looking for the apartment, I got a taste of that: viewings were always overcrowded, the auctioneers got stacks of ‘applications’ (with interested parties supplying all of their personal and financial details), and the rent they were asking for was, I thought, astronomical. So, when I found this 50m2 apartment in Hamburg-Dulsberg, less than 10 minutes walk from the Schön-Klinik in Eilbek, for rent not by a private landlord, but by a Wohnungsgenossenschaft (remember the ‘Genossenschaft’?), and for less than 600 euro (‘warm’), I did all I could to get on top of their list, and was over the moon when I got the ‘ok’.

Chalets and plots – for people living in apartments, right beside busy main roads.

I didn’t know then, what I learned from the newspaper the other day: that Dulsberg is in the ‘red zone’, marking a part of Hamburg which, in a sea of more affluent parts, is home to the highest number of ‘Leistungsempfänger’ in the city. When we took our walk on the wild side today, we saw what that meant here: loads of offices for getting help, a huge amount of creches with marvelous playgrounds, and little garden-parks (plots) besides busy streets. And – when we went into a ‘Bäckerei’ (run by an Asian fellow citizen) to buy one Bavarian ‘Brezel’, he charged us 85 cent for one Brezel, but put two into the bag. That’s would good neighbours are all about!

Pádraig was keeping up the good work today. He seems to get ready. They had removed the second drainage today, and were about to take an x-ray to make sure all was good with his lung, to be followed by a bronchoscopy to be sure. For the first time, the Oberarzt in charge in the ICU came in today and talked to us. She said that when they explained to Pádraig today that they were about to take out the last of the remaining drainages, he moved his arm across to the other sides and held on with his hand to the other arm; he also turned his head around. She hadn’t noticed purposeful movements like this before, apart from squeezing a hand. We took up her offer to talk again to the surgeon who had performed the last operation – but, unfortunately, he never turned up. We were happy with today news.

Another good day. Back in the red zone.

Today’s German Music Tip
Jan Delay, Hoffnung (2012). Einfach genial!
‘Und sagt dir, sagt dir dass alles besser wird
Und dass die Hoffnung als aller Letztes stirbt’
What’s hot
The red zone
What’s cold
Rent
The German word/phrase/verse of the day
Leistungsempfänger

Twitter: @forPadraig
#caringforPadraig
http://www.caringforPadraig.org
Upcoming events: http://www.caringforPadraig.org/events

Durchzug! Lüften! Schnell!

The man at the door looked nice. He was in his late 40s, had a bit of a beard, was soft spoken. He told me that he was from the ‘Wohnungsgenossenschaft Hamburg-Wandsbek von 1897’, one of my ‘Genossen’ so to speak. As he had passed by the house, he said, he had noticed that the apartment was occupied again. I nodded and smiled, about to thank him for his warm welcome. Then he said that he had noticed c-o-n-d-e-n-s-a-t-i-o-n on the lower part of the windows as he passed by, and had decided to call in. I was still smiling and nodding (but beginning to remember the several-pages-long official document I had signed before moving in, agreeing to ventilate, or: ‘lüften’, the apartment regularly and thoroughly). He continued by saying that he just wanted to remind me to ‘lüften’ regularly and vigorously. ‘So richtigen Durchzug’. I said, nodding and still smiling, that I fully understood and that we had been ‘lüften’ twice a day! So sorry, but that might not be enough, he interrupted. Also, you must open the windows completely, not just ‘auf Kippe stellen’ (tilted open), he added. And, you must keep them open for a while, he finished. I said that this was exactly what we were doing. Ah, he said, you know it

In case you missed the ‘Litfasssäule’ the other day – here is it!

depends on the outside temperature: if it’s 5 degrees celsius, you have to open them 5 minutes; if it’s 6 degrees, you must open them 6 minutes and so on. (I didn’t ask him what to do if the temperature fell beyond zero.) – You don’t get into an argument with your ‘Genossen’, especially if they are given you friendly advice. So I thanked him nicely, he left, I closed the door, and Pat and I had the best and biggest laugh for a long time. It was so good that I consider calling him back asking him about how to separate the rubbish, the time one can and cannot have showers (in order not to disturb the neighbors), or to safe electricity (Germans buy €20 bulbs in order to save energy).

Apart from ring at the door for a bit of comic-relief this morning, we have become much more accustomed to the rings and the bells of the ICU in the UKE by now. We cannot wait to leave it all behind, to hear the words: ‘You must leave now, take what you need, you think will last. But whatever you wish to keep, you better grab it fast…’ For a few minutes today, it looked like leaving was going to be delayed again, when Pádraig’s temperature, heart and respiratory rate, and oxygen levels all went a bit too high – but we were assured by the doctor, this was ‘normal’ and to be expected from time to time. – i guess, we will see tomorrow.

Two more friends arrived this afternoon from Dublin. They could not believe that such a big hospital could be so bare of visitors – except for about two dozen Turkish people, staying with one of their family and friend who is critically ill. At the moment, I think Pádraig is getting the best of two worlds: German health resources, technology, and care – and Irish family, friends, and visitors. Hearing and seeing all his friends here in Hamburg, telling him how much they all want him to get better, sharing their believe with him that his day of recovery will come soon, not giving up, persevere, being stubborn – all that will make him pull through these difficult times.

His friends also are continuing to organize some great events: at the upcoming table quiz in Na Fianna GAA club, the organizers will launch a campaign for Pádraig in connection with the Women’s Marathon (check it out on http://www.CaringforPadraig.org). Snámh Phádraig got some coverage in the Evening Herald tonight (full article here).

Today’s German Music Tip
D-Bo, Durchzug (2013). Never heard of him before – found it when I looked for instructions to create a draft (Durchzug) in our apartment:) Good for driving and dancing.
What’s hot
Open windows, fresh air, Durchzug
What’s cold
Condensation, anything getting stale
The German word/phrase/verse of the day
Stoßlüften, Durchzug

Twitter: @forPadraig
#caringforPadraig
http://www.caringforPadraig.org
Upcoming events: http://www.caringforPadraig.org/events

Bood pressure: check. Heart beat: check. Oxygen: check. Food and drug supply: check. X-ray: check. Drainage one: check. Drainage two: tbc. We are almost ready for departure. Mobiles switched off, all bags stored away safely, we are beginning to relax a little and to look forward to get moving again.

We are taxiing on the runway, to take off for the Schön-Klinik in Hamburg-Eilbek once the second and last drainage can be removed. They are about to get the good-bye flags and balloons out in the UKE to celebrate our departure which, we all hope, will not be delayed much longer. Of course, we all have been there before – and we will not believe it’s going to happen until it actually does.

Céad Míle Fáilte we had – now, it’s time to leave the UKE soon, we hope

Today, the nurse asked me was I also ‘vom Fach’ (of the medical profession) when I  asked about his ‘Blutwerte’. I said ‘no’ – and added that I had just picked up a few things along the long long road we have been traveling. The strange thing is that I am not sure whether I would ever want to become a ‘professional’ health carer, although, of course, I have got to value good health care like never before in my life over the past months. The reason for my doubts whether I would want to work as a nurse or a doctor is the (health care) ‘system’, which would most likely drive me bananas. There are ways to deal with systems that are so big you won’t be able to change them – where you have to find ways to live with them, without making your life hell and without loosing your sanity. This is what the Irish are really good at, and the Germans will never master:)

_________________________________________________________________
Another event has been added by friends caring for Pádraig:
A Table Quiz will be organised in Na Fianna GAA club on Friday 31/01/2014 at 8pm. Entry €20.00 per table. There will be prizes for the top three winning tables and a raffle.
_________________________________________________________________

For the time being though, and probably until the end of the week, we’re still here, in the early morning’ rain, on run way number nine, a long way from home, but getting ready to jump onto the ‘plane’ that will bring us to where we wanted be: in early neuro rehab in Eilbek.

Today’s German Music Tip
Ton, Steine, Scherben, Keine Macht für Niemand (1972). One of the first and most successful German Rock Bands, with one of their first songs: no power to nobody. The lead singer, Rio Reiser and his band lived for a long time in Fresenhagen, not far away from Tating.
What’s hot
On the road
What’s cold
Standing still
The German word/phrase/verse of the day
(Heinrich Heine [1797-1856]: Deutschland, ein Wintermärchen, Caput III)

Noch immer das hölzern pedantische Volk,
Noch immer ein rechter Winkel
In jeder Bewegung, und im Gesicht
Der eingefrorene Dünkel.

Sie stelzen noch immer so steif herum,
So kerzengrade geschniegelt,
Als hätten sie verschluckt den Stock,
Womit man sie einst geprügelt.

Twitter: @forPadraig
#caringforPadraig
http://www.caringforPadraig.org
Upcoming events: http://www.caringforPadraig.org/events

Here is one of my favourite stories, about ‘those very generous times’, about a great singer, one of the world’s greatest hotels (I once just about survived one night in:), and told by one of the world’s greatest poets (and an abysmal singer).

‘About a thousand years ago I used to live in this hotel in New York City, a very good hotel. In the elevator of that hotel, early in the morning I used to bump into a young woman. After about a week, I gathered my courage and I said to her, “Are you looking for someone?” She said, “Yes, I’m looking for Kris Kristofferson.” I said, “Little Lady, you’re in luck. I’m Kris Kristofferson.” Those were very generous times as you may have read. So she never lead on that she really knew I wasn’t Kris Kristofferson. Maybe I was Kris Kristofferson. I wasn’t wearing cowboy boots until that moment. – A couple of years later I was sitting at the bar of this Polynesian restaurant in Miami Beach, some place I hope I never bump into you. They serve drinks in ceramic coconut shells. All up and down the boulevards there are real coconut trees with real coconut shells. There is some arcane meaning in all of that but I couldn’t penetrate it. I was sitting at that bar and this young woman’s presence became very strong and I wrote this song for Janis Joplin at the Chelsea Hotel.’

The story came back to me when I caught up with the preparations of two big concerts Pádraig’s friends are organizing in Dublin for him, with some of Ireland’s best musicians (details to follow soon).

29 January 2014
The Workman’s Club. Concert for Pádraig. With Seo Linn, Members of Kila, and others…

05 February 2014
Concert in Coláiste Eoin

And there is another really great, imaginative event being organized by his friends: “Snámh Phádraig” – a sea swim in every county of Ireland with a coast line over just two days. When they told me about this, I thought that just doing it was quite some challenge. When I heard that they wanted to get a full bus load of 53 friends to join, I thought they were, well, let’s say ‘ambitious’. – Then the website went life today, and guess what? At the time of writing, they had 55 people signed up already. Not sure what is going on? Who on earth would want to go for not just one, but for dozens of swims in April, and in Ireland’s absolutely freezing coastal sea waters??? There seem to be enough crazy people around that they might have to organize a second bus if people keep signing up!

Pádraig is getting better and recovering from the operations. They stopped flushing out the lung, adjusted the drainage to make sure all fluid could get out of his lung, he is off the breathing apparatus now all of the time (or: until he’ll need it again, and if it was only for a few hours to relax). Later in the week they will continue with the ‘drill’: the removal of the first drainage, then the clamping of the second, finally the removal of the second drainage. Everybody would really like to see him back in Eilbek as soon as possible so that he’ll be able to (re-)start his early rehab – but (here is the ‘but’ again) we asked to be sure to be sure at each step along the way, in order to avoid as much as possible any nasty surprises. He’s had enough of them for the foreseeable future.

These are generous times. Nobody knows I’m not Leonard Cohen. Maybe I am. Who knows? Maybe I am. Although – I’m not wearing one of those fancy hats right now. What is beyond any doubt: These upcoming concerts for Pádraig and this Snámh are going to be magic. There will be live links to Hamburg, Germany, and the rest of the world, beaming strong positive vibes around the world from Ireland.

Ryan announcing Seo Linn and Colaiste Lurgan on the Late Late Show in August of 2013.

If you watched Brendan O’Connor on last night’s Saturday Night Show (I know, I know, you had better things to do…), you’ll know already that the one Irish person who got a one-way ticket on the next available flight to Mars is Ryan ‘Tubs’ Tubridy – or so Brendan wished. Judging by the reaction he got from the audience, he wasn’t the only who’d love to wish Ryan all the best for his new career on Mars TV. But (and isn’t there always a but?) this morning I discovered a Late Late Show clip from 13 September of last year of a performance demonstrating the best of what a Late Late Show can produce. Maybe not all is lost? I guess, Ryan will have a bit of time to re-consider whether he really wants to leave or not. I cried watching this clip…

Wake me up!

We were listening to German NDR radio and they were playing Avicii’s song ‘Wake me up’, which – in addition to making me look up the Late Late Show clip – also made us remember that Seo Linn – who have an Irish version of this song that has attracted 3.3m hits on youtube – will be playing at a concert that friends of Pádraig will be organizing for him.

When I watched the two videos, the original Seo Linn video and then their performance on the Late Late Show, I was in awe watching the fun, energy, and carefree-attitude on display here which are just incredible. And how apt: WAKE ME UP!

‘Feeling my way through the darkness
Guided by a beating heart
I can’t tell where the journey will end
But I know where to start’

Wake me up…

This morning, we rang the hospital and were told that Pádraig was well, everything was getting back to normal, and that he had been recovering well from the operation. What a relief! When we went to see him in the afternoon he looked well and seemed to be well on the road to recovery. His nurse was one of the kindest people you could meet. He said Pádraig was about his age. He then showed us how to do his mouth hygiene. We used about two dozen special swabs and two toothbrushes to clean Pádraig’s mouth using special liquid – all readily available in one of the many drawers in the cabinets of Pádraig’s room. The scary moment came when the nurse asked whether I wanted to shave Pádraig. I had never in my life done anything like it to anybody else – it’s bad enough to end up with a bloody face myself every so often. But it worked out fine, and as strange as it may sound, it felt good. Although it was really nothing, it was so good to be able to do something concrete for Pádraig. And I was really grateful to the nurse who had – instead of sending us out, as usual – decided to make us part of caring for Pádraig.

Two of his friends arrived later in the afternoon from Dublin who are taking out time from work and exam preparations to spend time with Pádraig. Friendship!

Today was a good day.

Today’s German Music Tip
Avicii (feat. Aloe Blacc), Weck mich auf (2013). Of course, this version is not by Avicii, but by a German singer (and his friend); you can check out the lyrics here. The really interesting bit is the contract between the German and the Irish language versions:).
What’s hot
Waking up
What’s cold
Worries
The German word/phrase/verse of the day
Litfaßsäule – something I had completely forgotten about, not just the word but also the concept, until I saw two in a row this morning when I was walking to the Bäckerei.

‘This is like normal life, isn’t it?’ A few hours of chat, laughter, conversations about every-day-like topics: carefree, unworried, light-hearted, young. What a difference that must have made to Pádraig: no beeps, no bells, no trollies. Just plain, simple, lovely, creative conversations, full of energy and enthusiasm, as only young people, and those young at heart, can have them.

There have been friends with Pádraig almost every day for the past weeks and months, and if you check out the calendar you’ll see that this will continue. His friends come a long way, and they stay for days. A nurse said that in her many decades of work she has never seen anything like it. ‘If I got sick, you could count the number of visitors I’d get on your two hands – it’s really amazing what’s going on here’, she said, and then she corrected herself: ‘one hand would actually do to count the people that would visit me’. I tell her that it wouldn’t be different in my case, and how happy Pádraig must be to see that his friends, the one thing he values more than anything else in his life, are staying with him, and go through all this trouble to be with him and show him their support.

It’s easy to loose perspective if you are spending months on end in a hospital, a lot of that time in ICUs. Days disappear in a haze. This couldn’t be 11 January?! What ever happened to Christmas, the New Year, the ‘holidays’?? The idea I had of ‘normality’ has morphed into something completely different from what it was six months ago. Only when I am reading up on a condition or a procedure do I realize that what is happening to Pádraig is far from ‘normal’. A prolonged stay in an ICU is not normal. The number and kind of operations he has had are far from normal. Being in bed and in a coma for more than six months is not normal. This serious and prolonged lung trouble is not normal at all. His vulnerability is not normal either. What would be ‘routine’ in the case of a healthy person becomes high-risk in his case. But because he is the young, strong fighter that he is, and because he has the support of so, so many friends who believe that he will be able to pull through all of this in the end – he is overcoming all the obstacles put in his way, and he keeps fighting.

Today, all the ‘figures’ were wrong and troublesome: heart, breathing, temperature – yes, postoperative stress, a  reaction like that in the case of an infection, bound to disappear over the next 12-24 hours, but still high. It’ll be all right tomorrow. All right.

Today’s German Music Tip
Glasperlenspiel, Freundschaft (2012). Techno (if this is ‘techno’) is not really my kind of music, but it’s not a bad song, especially if you’re dancing to it. The lyrics are a bit ‘in your face’ but nothing wrong with that either.
What’s hot
Tomorrow
What’s cold
Today’s worries
The German word/phrase/verse of the day
Wunderbar

Twitter: @forPadraig
#caringforPadraig
web: http://www.caringforPadraig.org

Just heard from a doctor that Pádraig’s third operation in less than two weeks went well and Pádraig is ok. They removed blood effusions, or hemorrhages, from the lung and loosened it up so that it could fully inflate again. – We are waiting outside to see him. Isn’t that great news!

Don’t trust anyone above 30! – The generation of ’68

“If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it… Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh never mind; you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked….You’re not as fat as you imagine.”

You’re in a captive space. There is nowhere out. For the next 10 hours you’re going to drive down this road and he will sit beside you and nothing and nobody is going to stop him from playing his music. Have you ever been in a situation like this? Do you know what I’m talking about? I had brought my music, really great music I wanted to share with the rest of the family – only that nobody wanted to share that experience with me. There was no contest. We were going to listen to Kila, The Script, Mundy, BellX1, TG Lurgan, MGMT, Ham Sandwich, and: Baz Luhrmann.

A captive space – from Seyfried’s famous ’68 book ‘Wo soll das alles enden?’

“Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as
effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing
bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that
never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm
on some idle Tuesday.”

Now, years later, I think: those were the days. This is the music. I would still be singing Dylan songs were it not for those long, captive hours when I was condemned to listen to all this really really hot music.

Pádraig, the man of the music, is breathing today on what they call a T-piece, just oxygen support, no pumps nor pressure, all by himself. Which is really good news. The consultant didn’t show up today and one of the junior doctors advised us they would keep flushing his lungs to remove whatever ‘stuff’ they could flush out, until tomorrow morning. They will then reassess the situation and decide whether he will need another operation.

Three of his old (!) friends arrived today, all less than half my age; they said they are beginning to feel old. How I feel for them. Two have been with Pádraig half way around the world. They staid with him almost around the clock in Hyannis; visited him in Ireland; and are now back with him in Germany. I wonder whether he ever realized how privileged he is having such good friends.

Where will this all end?

“Understand that friends come and go,but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.”

“Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who
supply it. … But trust me on the sunscreen…”

PS: Just came across this clip from John Q. A down-on-his luck father, whose insurance won’t cover his son’s heart transplant, takes the hospital’s emergency room hostage until the doctors agree to perform the operation. – A bit on the extreme side, but Denzel W. definitely has a point.