First say to yourself what would you be; and then do what you have to do.
Epictetus

You must have asked yourself at times: What if…?

As all other parents in An Saol, I have asked this question myself a thousand times: What if I cannot look after Pádraig anymore? What if something happened to me? Over the years, it became clearer that the question might not even be “what if?” but “what when? When I’ll find it hard to walk myself? When I won’t be able to lift myself up out of a chair?

Epitectus got it right, 2 1/2 thousand years ago. As a slave and being impaired with a lame leg, he became known for his Stoic endurance. Had he just drifted through life he would have died soon. Instead, he went for discipline and consistency, with clear aims for his life in mind.

Statistics suggest that Pádraig one day will, most likely, have to life his life without me. Rather than just waiting for that day to come, we need to prepare for it. This is why I am trying hard to make Teach An Saol a reality. For us and for others in a similar situation.

I still believe that our health and our political system will recognise how important Teach An Saol is for so many people. That they will act and take up our offer to set it up.

In the meantime, another way for us to prepare for that day is, occasionally, to get away for a short time. To remove ourselves from the equation.

That’s what we did this weekend.

Pádraig is at home, without us but well looked after by his family. While we are in the Vaterland checking out places we usually would not go to. So far, it worked out well for all.

We know that Pádraig has all the support he needs at home, even without us, for the weekend. A weekend that is a big exception for him and for us. We are all lucky to have each other and be able to rely on each other. We don’t take it as a given and we know that not every family is in this fortunate position. Which is why Teach An Saol and the proposed Respite Hub are so badly and so urgently needed.

Life without Pádraig is unimaginable. When we eat. When we drive. When we go for a walk. Even when we talk. He is present.

Which doesn’t come as a surprise. Because, usually, he is with us all the time. He is so much part of our life that it is unimaginable without him.

His life is meaningful & fulfilled. Without him, An Saol would not exist. Our lives and, especially that of other people affected by a severe brain injury, would be so much bleaker.

Pádraig shares his strength, hope, and humanity. And I need to make sure he can continue doing this. The day I can’t, others will be ready.